There are two thoughts by Echardt Tolle that continue to capture my attention and inspire me. The first is to live as if you choose each moment. How applicable that is to this getting off nicotine! Learning how to wean off of one’s dependency comes down to making a choice each and every time we get an urge to smoke. I know that sounds scary to those who have not yet learned how to do that, but that is essentially the “magic” everyone is looking for.
This process leads to true freedom from the dependency on nicotine to get through the day. That feeling when you get in bed at night and say, “Wow! I made it through a really bad day, and I didn’t smoke! I didn’t use nicotine to fix my problem! It is so refreshing not to have to go back to my old way of life!” There is no greater gift than that freedom for a person hooked on nicotine.
Now if you have a clever mind like mine, you might think, “Well, I just won’t have desires to smoke anymore and that will solve that problem! I will just take a pill, strap a patch, chew some gum.” I wish it were that simple. Have you ever wondered why so many people are still smoking after they did all of that? They weren’t motivated, they didn't really want to, really?
Did you know that 70% of smokers and vapers want to quit? So why haven’t they? Because they have not been successful at getting rid of their urges. They have not been able to effectively repress their urges so that they are no longer conscious of them. But think about it, if you have been smoking for 40, 50, 60 years, do you really think the urges to smoke are magically going to go away? Tolle didn’t say it, but what you resist persists! Its a fundamental principle.
Stopping smoking or vaping is a matter of learning how to allow yourself to experience the urgess and the inevitable temporary withdrawal that tkes place while stopping. That way, they loose their power, and you are not fighing a loosing battle.
This comes to the second thought by Tolle that I find invauable, and is born out by this process: He says that the inner alignment with the now is the end of suffering. In other words when you learn to just be with the urges and not fight them or resist them, then you have a lasting chance at not being pushed around by your need for nicotine. “Oh, that’s too hard! That’s not possible! I am a busy person. I am not a masochist!”
I am not suggesting you become anyone other than who you already are. But I invite you to look at your atitude towards discomfort. It is negative. In fact, most programs suggest that discomfort is bad and relief is good. But that is the dynamic of smoking and vaping. We smoke or take a hit to get relief because we refuse to experience wanting nicotine. So anything that offers relief in place of the cigarette or vape is teaching you to transfer your dependency from one substance to another, or one form of nicotine to another. So, let me ask you some ciritical quesitons: Where is the recovery from your dependency in transerring your need? How are you going to recover from nicotine if you refuse to face your dependency on it? How can you solve a problem you either keep denying you have, or are running from?
If you are not using an approach that teaches you how to be okay with your urges to smoke, I am afraid you may end up trying too many times to stop. Personally I tried eight times before I found a way out. The way out is through! Let me teach you how.
None of my clients have died or needed to be medicated to be successful. None needed to quit their high-pressure jobs. None had to go to an island or be locked up. Don’t need to dwell in it. With this method you will learn how to just allow your urges, to not fight them. Its rather like sitting on the side of the road and watching as they come and go.
Now, there is one value that all smokers and vapers eventually come to: You must value recovery more than relief. You may not know how. That’s wher I come in to support you, or someone else! But you will need to bring with you your why. For most, it takes a crisis. I hope yours is not as bad as mine was.
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